Monday, 24 November 2014
Saturday, 22 November 2014
We suffer all the same but the Past is still better?
Among few merits of taking a largely unplanned gap year is a
freedom to choose to be exempt from current affairs, as a student major in
International Relations. Keeping abreast of the news is a deeply depressing
endurance of atrocity and absurdity that I have long stopped relishing. At
first I fly into rage, at the appalling absurdity, and dreadful deeds practiced
as a matter of course for many, and I learnt to rebuke and argue. It then steps
into disgust beyond disguise, when there is readily a group of people trying to
defend these behaviors with a catalogue of illogical gibberish, which can be
seen as tasteless jokes at best, or backward inhumanity at worst. A mixture of
disgust, and vestiges of anger, was finally grinded down into a complete
disappointment and depression, when it is repeated like tide, coated with
morality, and there is little you can do about it. And it becomes a disdainful
silence. That accounts for my deliberate withdrawal from watching what is going
on in the world, when I am allowed such liberty, especially with regard to my
hometown. (Umbrella Movement.)
So I take refuge in the past – at least this year. Not that
I wish to propose an idea that the past was better and people were happier, on
the contrary, I believe that every generation and age has its own frustration
in the face of different form of crisis. In Medieval Europe it would be hard to
imagine that I could travel across continents in my life, let alone a much
lower life expectancy. The pulse of my life would be dictated by harvest,
plague and all sort of strange reasons inconceivable at present and insolvable
in past. There is little ground to argue the past was better in terms of
material, health and hygiene between the past and present. Leo Tolstoy, in his
great work Anna Karenina, said that
“there are no conditions of life to which a man cannot get accustomed,
especially if he sees them accepted by everyone around him.” A continuity of
human being and civilisation does rely hugely on such astonishing adaptability
that serves as both blessings and curse. Human beings prove exceptionally
tolerant under harsh, relentless situation, which serves as an obstacle of
progress in many cases. If we can tolerate it, so be it, why change? As well as
proving how insufferable lives have always been, Tolstoy’s telling quote also
tells us our adaptability enables us to acquire happiness, outside of physical
world. How much we possess is not the only force that determines how happy we are,
neither nor how long we live, for it can be tedious and boring. It is also a
matter of depth of life, and what we believe in. Life and happiness were
discussed almost two thousand years ago by the Greeks, Chinese and other
civilizations. In Iliad Achilles was faced two courses opened to him, either a
long quiet life with little “glory” or an ephemeral life that marked his name
in history. Confucius talks about the importance of practicing and clinging to
virtues at the cost of life in a dilemma of moral crisis. These sages enrich
the idea of what life and happiness is about, reminding us of an alternative
yardstick of examining meaning of life. It
also reminds us of a perpetual situation of which we are plunged into, that we
are forced to adapt and make difficult decisions as long as we breathe. We
always suffer.
If the past and present are not necessarily better off or
worse off on solely account of material progression, and people sufferings can
be a matter of perception and self-perception, what is it that draws me to the
past and makes me turn away from the present? People suffer in the past for all
sorts of ridiculous reasons like us today, or many will argue that it was even
worse. Sufferings wrench my heart, whenever and wherever they take place. Two
things mark the differences between sufferings in the past and sufferings
happening now. The past is handled logically, and tampered is with a
consolatory chronological order with beginnings and endings. The present is
messy and tumultuous. Secondly, reading the past I am an observant who shares
little responsibility for what happened, whilst reading the news I am one of
the many participants that is endowed with duty to shape our future.
I am sympathetic with the people sufferings in the past. The
Russian Revolution was made up of heaps of skeletons, streams of blood and
piles of corpse. I was working on this topic in my first year at St. Andrews,
and I spent nights of research on such topic in the library to a point that I
felt too depressed to continue. It was a pain of witnessing an unfortunate fall
of the liberals and following ascendance of Lenin and Stalin, no doubt at the
will of many Russian people, and at the expense of their lives too. I tried to
extract and examine many strings of cold causation in that period, formed them
into arguments, a process of extracting knowledge from it. Apart from this
mechanical job, I seemed to hear voices of screaming and crying of those
Russian people that night in the library, when I closed the book and put it aside.
Pining so much hope on the promising future human beings, I cannot stress enough
a power of imagination that enables to tolerate with so much misfortunates
after repeated broken promises. Always hope for the better tomorrow, and it
never comes. I have so much sympathy with them, but I am fortunate in one way
that I was not one of them. I am only an observer that watches them with
detachment. That is why I can endure reading the past. Whilst in looking at the
news and present, I am one of the characters, no matter how trivial I am, in
the tragedy that has been performing for thousands years.
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